Sunday, August 29, 2010


So today we had another first.  The first baptism since the girls were each baptized.  And it just so happened to be our best friend's little girl who was baptized.  Such a happy day but sad in its own way too.  I sat there listening to Pastor Dave's words.  Words so similar to what I heard on June 24 and June 30.  But my girls were being prepared to go to Heaven and Taylor was being prepared to live her life here on Earth.  It brought tears to my eyes.  My heart is heavy with the loss...all the "never going to happens."

After church we headed to the Holwerda's house (Laura's parents) and ate lunch.  Thankfully it was a beautiful (although quite humid) afternoon.  We had a great time and as we were leaving we got to chat with Pastor Dave and Linda (his wife).  We had a great talk with them.  And of course I shed lots of tears but received lots of hugs.  We set up a time after Labor Day to get together with them for dinner.  Something to look forward to.  Pastor Dave and Linda were huge for us (big time prayer warriors) when we were in the midst of losing the girls.  So thankful for them. 

I told them how this past week I was feeling like everyone had forgotten about us.  Forgotten that we lost the girls.  It's still so real to us.  Others go on with their lives but Brian and I are stuck.  Stuck in the here and now.  Wanting to be anywhere else.  But then God reminds me that we are not forgotten.  A wonderful friend from church called to see how I was.  We had an awesome conversation and her prayer for me made me cry.  A couple that I baby-sat for when I was younger sent me the most special care package (a frame, a necklace, and a letter).  The "Card Lady" sent me another card.  Others sent cards saying that they still think about us often.  My mom told me about all the people who ask her how we're doing.  So I just want to thank my Heavenly Father for letting me know that people still care.  People are still praying.  We have not been forgotten.

Never feel nervous to ask me how I'm doing.  Never feel nervous to ask me about my girls.  I love talking about them.  They were my life.  They still are.  I think about them every day and the memories I have I will cherish forever.

The frame from the care package (the two roses are in remembrance of Alayna and Ella)

As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you...
John 15:9

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