It seems like EVERYONE at work is pulling me to the side to tell me that their pregnant too. Which I am so very thankful for but at the same time it's hard. My manager told me a couple weeks ago that she was pregnant and she just announced it yesterday (thankfully on a day that I was not working). And another coworker told me on Sunday that she was expecting...her third. And on the same day that I found out my manager was pregnant I found out that another coworker (who happens to not be married) was pregnant. It doesn't seem fair to me.
And I found out last week that a friend is expecting her second. Which makes me jealous. Brian and I have been TTC since March of 2009. When will it be our turn to take a baby home.
I mentioned (above) 14 babies that have or will be born by April 2011. My guess is that all of them will get to take healthy babies home (and I want them to all take healthy babies home). But why was I the one who did not get to. And I know a lot of people say they never ask God why things happen to them but I am. I am asking. I want to know WHY. After I ask God why he took my girls so early...my next question will be why do some people (ahem me) have to struggle SO SO SO to get pregnant and have children and others say I want a baby and a baby they get.
But I will hold tight to my Savior...
Therefore if you desire to know God's voice, never consider the final outcome or the possible results. Obey Him even when He asks you to move while you still see only darkness, for He Himself will be a glorious light within you. Then there will quickly spring up within your heart a knowledge of God and a fellowship with Him, which will be overpowering enough in themselves to hold you and Him together, even in the most severe tests and under the strongest pressures of life (Streams in the Desert).
And our devotions from last night were just what I needed to hear...
Apparent adversity will ultimately become an advantage for those of us doing what is right, if we are willing to keep serving and to wait patiently. Think of the great victorious souls of the past who worked with steadfast faith and who were invincible and courageous! There are many blessings we will never obtain if we are unwilling to accept and endure suffering. There are certain joys that can come to us only through sorrow. There are revelations of God's divine truth that we will receive only when the lights of earth have been extinguished. And there are harvests that will grow only once the plow has done its work. It is from suffering that the strongest souls ever known have emerged; the world's greatest display of character is seen in those who exhibit the scars of sorrow; the martyrs of the ages have worn their coronation robes that have glistened with fire, yet through their tears and sorrow have seen the gates of heaven (Streams in the Desert).
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11: 28-31)