Monday, November 29, 2010

Ouch

And the roller-coaster of grief AND infertility continues.  I wonder when it will end.  I wonder when I will feel happy again. I have said it before and I will say it again...this journey is emotionally exhausting and I really don't know how much more I can take.  It seems like I keep getting kicked.  One kick on top of another with no breaks in between.  And the kicks don't stop even though I am already on my knees praying for it to all end.

"This is what the Lord says: Put your house in order, because you are going to die; you will not recover."  Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed to the Lord, "Remember, O Lord, how I have walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and have done what is good in your eyes."  And Hezekiah wept bitterly....Go back and tell Hezekiah, the leader of my people, 'This is what the Lord, the God of your father David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you....I will add 15 years to your life. 2 Kings 20:1b-6a

So this is my new prayer...

Hear your faithful servant calling out to you O Lord.  Hear my pleas.  See my tears.  Restore my smile.  And renew my life. AMEN!

3 comments:

  1. Nothing but prayers and a new found hope for you and Brian.

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  2. HE will Lindsey! Your dark days are coming to an end...I know it! xoxo

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  3. I am praying for you extra today!!

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