Saturday, February 28, 2015

The Journey To (Earthly) Baby #3 : Week 14

If you haven't already noticed I have not been near as good at documenting (or taking belly pics) this pregnancy. I have been so exhausted and thus in bed by 8/8:30 most nights and if I get both kids down simultaneously to nap then mama is napping too. And as for picture taking...I feel like I rarely get ready these blistering cold winter days. Anyways...

February 24 28
How Far Along: 14 weeks 14 weeks and 4 days

Picture of Baby:
13 weeks 2 days with a heartbeat of 167

Maternity Clothes: Pulled them out of storage this past week. Guessing I'll start wearing some of my maternity pants here real soon. My leggings and sweats have served me real well up to this point.

Weight Gain: I started at 148 pounds. (Two more pounds than the start of Mol's pregnancy and 1 pound more than the start of Mase's pregnancy). I stink at getting on the scale so I've maybe only done it once or twice this pregnancy. I'm (guessing) I'm currently plus about 8-10 pounds.

Picture of Baby IN the Belly:
Sleep: The moment I hit 6 weeks I am up peeing 3-4 times a night. Ugh...it gets old...26ish weeks to go!

Movement: Nothing yet. But I have an anterior placenta so won't feel it as early I've been told. We shall see.

Symptoms: From the beginning...back and shoulder acne. Tiredness. Hot flashes. General "blah" feeling. Hunger. Cramping. Bad taste in my mouth. Bloating (especially after meals and gets worse as the day goes on). Retching started at 10ish weeks. Worse when I am tired.

Food Cravings: Meat and fruit. And eating OUT!!!

Gender: Going for the surprise again!!!

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

The Journey To (Earthly) Baby #3: Nerves and Sharing The WONDERFUL News

January 30, 2015
I told Brian last night that I had actually told my mom about the pregnancy back on the day I tested. I could tell he was slightly annoyed :) but all he said was that I was terrible at keeping secrets. I on the other hand feel like I keep them quite good. After all he didn't know that I told my mom 6 weeks prior. So just the kids and I went over to my parent's house to tell my dad the news. Mason gave him the picture (that announced our pregnancy)...and he immediately "got it" and was of course very happy for us. He even said...this was a surprise wasn't it? I said YEP...how did you know? His response...normally I hear a play by play when its fertility and I haven't heard a thing.

Later that night we went out for dinner with my in-laws to tell them the news. Again I had Mason hand (my mother-in-law) the picture. It took her a minute before she got it but was quickly all smiles. She said when did you implant? You guys never said a word about it. To which I said we didn't. And then her excitement multiplied by a million.

January 31, 2015
Went to my nephew's soccer game this morning and afterwards went to my sister's house to eat lunch (and to tell her the news)!!! Gave her the picture and she was definitely surprised.

February 1, 2015
A few weeks back my mother and I concocted a plan. Nothing crazy but we thought it would be fun to tell the family when everyone was together. So she invited everyone over for Sunday dinner. While eating dessert I gave both my sister-in-law's the picture. Needless to say they were excited AND shocked when we said it wasn't fertility.

Later that night I texted my close girlfriends the picture. Once again the response was one of excitement and shock.


February 6, 2015
I made it a mere week and a half before my nerves started to get the best of me. The fact that my next appointment is still 3 weeks away is definitely NOT helping. I woke up with diarrhea this morning (at 11w3d) and have no appetite anymore. Guessing this is because we told everyone over the last few days so then I start freaking out that something bad is going to happen. And per my norm with nerves I lose my appetite. My OB's office called today saying they had to change my appointment because Jelsema was not going to be in the office on Feb 26. Asked if I could move it up to the 24th. Nope I work. Then asked if I could move it back to the 3rd. Thankfully I worked that day too but there is NO way I was moving it back 5 days with how I was already feeling. So it was moved up a week to February 19. Two weeks to go.

February 10, 2015
Decided that today I would doppler myself at work to hopefully hear the baby's heartbeat. Now let me say here that this doppler is actually to help find pulses and blood pressures. Stretching a bit to find an 11 week heartbeat. One of my friends at work helped me and initially all we could find was my own but then we heard that blessed sound. Sweet music to my ears. Wouldn't you know within an hour I was starving hungry again. Oh nerves...how I loathe you.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

The Journey To (Earthly) Baby #3: Ultrasounds Galore

December 29
Was giving Molly a bath when I felt some sharp cramping. Immediately checked and sure enough blood on my pad and blood when I wiped. Feeling like its the beginning of the end...again. But (as always) life goes on and I have dinner plans with my girlfriends so I slap on a smile and make the most of the night.

Jan 7, 2015
US day #2. Left a few minutes early due to the terrible roads but didn't leave nearly early enough. I was 15 minutes late. (I have NEVER been late to a fertility appointment IN MY 5 YEARS OF GOING...took me 50 minutes to get there when it normally takes 25). I surely didn't need the extra nerves (added to those I already had). Thankfully I was seen right away and after telling Dodds about the spotting and being prepared for this US to go either way...in the probe went and Praise The Lord we immediately saw a baby and a heartbeat!!! Baby measured in at 12.2mm or 7w3d (and today I am only 7w1d). Heartbeat of 144. According to Dodds everything looks perfect at this point. We did schedule one more US because I'm still nervous about miscarrying (because of my betas not doubling and the bout of spotting). US scheduled for Jan 22. I WILL (trying to be positive) be 9w2d at this appointment.
7 weeks and 1 day
8 weeks
January 22
US #3. Arrived plenty early today (didn't want to be late again)! Of course (fitting for my nerves) in walks a resident who says I'm so and so and I'm going to start your US and Dodds will be along in a minute. Thankfully I am a pro at "reading" ultrasounds by now because I immediately saw a baby with a heartbeat. (Whew)!!! The girl was fairly quiet so after a minute I asked if everything looked okay. Thankfully it did but I could have used some quicker reassurance. I am so use to Dodds saying everything looks great as he's checking things out. Dodds walked in and also did a once over and (per Dodds) told me immediately how great everything looked!!! I said to him at that point that I think its a girl. He laughed and said why and I said based on my symptoms. He asked what those symptoms were and I said EXTREME tiredness and EXTREME hunger. After getting dressed I met with him in his office and he told me I had officially graduated!!! He recorded his note to be sent to Jelsema and said blah blah blah...we were getting Lindsey set for her final implantation when she took matters into her own hands and went and got pregnant on her own :). (When I was leaving he told me not to tell "our secret" he wanted to stay in business. Love that guy!!! As for baby #3 s/he measured 27.5mm (coming in at 9w4d) with a heartbeat of 188.
9 weeks and 2 days

And just for my record keeping...my symptoms started right at 6 weeks. Symptoms included EXTREME tiredness, hunger (however very picky about what I'll eat because not everything sounds good. Going out to eat though always sounds good), bloated belly, general blah feeling all.the.time, water sounds terrible, milk is my go to drink, peeing all.the.time (and 3-4 times a night), and I have had 1 migraine. No wretching until I hit 10 weeks.

January 27
US #4. After my third ultrasound on Thursday I called my OB's office Friday morning and they squeezed me into the schedule for the following Tuesday at 3:30. Only problem was I was suppose to work that day. Long story short I had to tell my manager (but didn't get a hold of her until Monday late morning) and she okayed me to leave for my appointment and had the Charge Nurse cover for me. Per my norm I was nervous all day but was quickly relieved when I saw my sweet baby moving with a strong heartbeat. Crazy how much can change in 5 days. Baby was waving his/her arms and kicking his/her legs! Heartbeat on two different measurements was 183 then 175. Afterwards I met with my (high risk) OB and he said that everything looked perfect and that this pregnancy would follow Molly's but with a few change ups. Since this one was conceived natural...I will not have an ECHO and I will not have as many growth ultrasounds. (They do the growth scans because IVF pregnancies can cause more growth restrictions). My nurse was so excited to see me (and was SHOCKED when I told her this was not an IVF pregnancy). And Jelsema per his norm made me feel normal despite my nerves. (And he told me to tell Brian..."he's the man!") LOVE LOVE LOVE my doctors (and their nurses)!!!

Monday, February 23, 2015

The Journey To (Earthly) Baby #3: Beta 2, Beta 3, US 1

December 18
Then came Thursday (beta day #2). I was at my parent's house when the call came. It was my favorite nurse Sandy. She said CONGRATS and went on to say how shocked she was to see my chart on her desk since I hadn't done any treatments. She then said your level is 1142. My response..."Oh no I'm gonna miscarry again because the last time my numbers didn't double I went on to miscarry." She told me that everything could still be fine. That she had to talk some things over with Dodds and would get back to me on a plan. She called back three hours later and said Dodds wanted me to get my labs drawn again on Monday and then I was scheduled for an US on Friday December 26. Based off my last cycle I would only be 5 weeks 3 days but again since this was an all natural thing and with my numbers being SO high...they wanted me in sooner rather than later.

December 18-21
I'm enjoying the waiting game oh so much (insert sarcasm) but since the flu bug hit our home late Thursday afternoon (Mason then me then Mason again and finally ending with Brian) I didn't have much time to think about it. Besides I know by now that worrying isn't going to change the outcome.

December 22
Beta day #3. Off to work I go after a week off (since I had to call in sick on Friday). An IVF nurse called just after 10am and gave me my latest hcg level...3238. Ugh. Still going up nicely but still not doubling. Trying to think positive that all could still be well. Hopefully and maybe just maybe...

December 25
5 weeks 2 days...(belly is popping cause it was Christmas night)!!!

December 26
Happy Birthday Molly and Happy Ultrasound day to me. Go figure I would wake up earlier than my norm but being Molly's birthday I was plenty distracted. I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be going to an ultrasound ALL BY MYSELF. (Brian sat in the car with the kids). Dr. Young came in and after some small chat about going and getting knocked up all on our own he performed the US and said right away I see the sac. It took a minute longer to see the yolk sac but it was there. No fetal pole though. However, Dr. Young was very reassuring and said he saw exactly what he would expect to see at 5 weeks 3 days. I got dressed and went to a different room to chat with him.
Dr. Young gave me my estimated DD...August 25, 2015. And said now remind me...its a male factor issue right? I said yes. He said low count. To which I responded no poor motility and morphology. He looked at my chart and said actually crappy motility and morphology. And then went on to say the following. Do you remember the movie Dumb and Dumber...when Jim Carey asks the really good looking girl what the chance is of the two of them ending up together and she says not good. Jim Carey (Lloyd) then says "you mean, not good like one out of a hundred?" She says "more like one out of a million." To which he replys "So you're telling me there's still a chance?!?" Dr. Young said that pretty much sums up Brian and I. Lol. Always keeping it real!!! My next US is scheduled for January 7. (I will be 7 weeks 1 day). Praying we see a baby with a heartbeat.

Sunday, February 22, 2015

The Journey to (Earthly) Baby #3: The Beginning and Beta 1

September 22, 2014
Called the Fertility Center to set up thee final consult appointment with Dr. Dodds. Appointment scheduled (first available) for October 22. (Good thing I called when I did).

October 22, 2014
Met with Dr. Dodds to set up our last (frozen embryo) transfer. Based on my cycle and the FET calendar we're looking at an early February 2015 transfer!!!

October 28, 2014
Had what I hope to be my last sonohystogram. My ute (uterus) looked great. Or in other words...ready to bake an embie or two!!! Told to call for my Lupron start date off my December cycle.

November, 18, 2014
Cycle started.

December 15, 2014
Surprised my cycle didn't start today. Normally once I am regular (as in a 28 day cycle) I stay regular.

December 16, 2014
SPEECHLESS...
 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord. 
Isaiah 55:8

As some say it only happens to my sister-in-law's aunt's cousin's sister's niece. In my case I would have agreed...but as already shown...God's ways are NOT my ways. Here's the back story: I woke up this morning with a nervous feeling in my tummy. I still had not received my tell-tale sign that my cycle was about to start. So I did something I've never felt the urge to do before...I took an hpt. I set the kids up for breakfast (to keep them distracted), popped in 2 Eggo waffles for myself, and then I headed to the bathroom to pee on a stick. (I had ONE hpt left from when I was pregnant with Molly. If you don't remember after I get a positive blood test I like to pee on a stick just for the fun of it). Wasn't in a million years thinking it would turn positive (just wanted reassurance that I would be getting my period soon). After peeing on the stick I headed back to the kitchen and took two bites of my waffle before walking back to the bathroom. And that is when I nearly shit my pants, started shaking, lost my appetite, and started crying. And not tears of joy. Tears of this cannot be! What is God doing? Why on earth would we get pregnant the month before preparations for our last transfer. I was suppose to start Lupron on day 21 of my December cycle. Be on Lupron 10-14 days. And then once my Lupron cycle started...18 days later (beginning of February) I would be implanted. And finally we could and WOULD close the infertility chapter FOR GOOD.

With tears in my eyes and my hand shaking I texted Brian..."Call me" "Or can I" "Yo" all within seconds of each other. He immediately called (if its not a rush I always text "Not an ER") and I just blurted out..."I think I'm pregnant." He was silent at first, scolded me about {our} lack of responsibility, and maybe asked a question or two (to be honest I really don't remember much of our conversation). After I got off the phone with Brian I called the Fertility Office. I (thankfully) got to talk to an IVF RN right away. She said the first step to confirm would be to do a blood test. So off to the West Pavilion I went to get my hcg drawn with my two kiddos in tow. And wouldn't you know my mom called just as we were pulling out of the parking lot. Of course she asked what I was doing (she was at work) and since there's not much I hide from my mom without thinking I blurted out "I think I'm pregnant." I'm leaving the West Pavilion where I just got my labs drawn. The first thing out of her mouth was scolding (about being careful and what not). To which I replied little too late and please don't scold me too...Brian already did that. (Feeling like a pregnant unmarried teen at this point). Then she changed her tune to you're right...this is an absolute miracle. 

The rest of the day was spent in a numb shock hoping that maybe just maybe the hpt was wrong. There was a knock on my door around 2. It was my mom. Around 2:30 my phone call came. I was in fact VERY pregnant. My hcg was 702. (My highest hcg to date was with the twins at 156). My response was...WHY IS THAT NUMBER SO HIGH!!!
And second how CAN this be? We were given a LESS THAN 1% chance of ever conceiving on our own. In answer to the first question...the nurse calling asked how sure I was of the start of my last cycle. My answer...VERY. She said I pry ovulated early but since it was not an IVF cycle it was hard to say. That night Brian and I talked lots (imagine that). I had a sleepless night but come Wednesday morning I was starting to get excited. And starting to dream of shocking the bejeebs out of EVERYONE!!!

December 17
4 weeks and 1 day

Saturday, February 21, 2015

With God the IMpossible is POSSIBLE

As always I will follow with more of the story in the days and weeks to come. But lets just say this pregnancy came as a COMPLETE SURPRISE...

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Ten On Thursday

1. Mason took a {toy} hammer to my phone Super Bowl Sunday. Ouch!!! After he "broke" my phone he ran up to me telling me that he "broke" it. Then started crying that he wanted to go to bed. (It was only 8pm).
2. Love my little ROCKERS...
3. Yep he's THAT boy at the mall.
4. Look at those chipmunk cheeks. Loves her some apple.
5. One of Mason's favorite sayings lately..."Hey mom...look. Take a picture."
6. Sitting like a Queen Bee in the front seat. Thank goodness brother wanted to walk else this would not have flown. (She wouldn't sit in the back. She wanted to walk just like her brother which just wasn't working).
7. How Molly stays occupied while I shower....
 8. Brrr....
9. My {+} influenza A boy finally starting to feel better after 4 days of high fevers and not eating, a nasty nasty cough (going on just under two weeks now), a runny nose, and lethargic acting.
And then he passed the joy onto his lil sis. Lovely. Hoping tomorrow is our first fever free day since last week Friday.
10. Trying out pig tails. Maybe not "leaving the house" worthy but a way to keep her hair from sticking to her snotty runny nose. I also find this picture funny because she is staring at her brother's pacis. Pry trying to decide where to hide them ;). (She can now tell the difference between his and hers and never puts his in her mouth).
"

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Ten On Thursday

1. Mase had his yearly (renal) ultrasound back mid January. Afterwards he had some fun playing in the lobby. (And his US was unchanged from last year...which means we get to go again next year. Hoping that next year his hydronephrosis is completely resolved because I just got the bill in the mail today and it wasn't pretty :/).
 2. I was SO sick of Molly's sippys spilling that I got her some new. Think she likes!?!
Mason got the "boy" color. (It was a 3 pack).
 
3. My dad did something to his back just before Christmas. His new "wheels" are a fave among these two. (Again this picture was from back mid January).
4. Mason loves to take selfies with my phone...
5. Wish we had a toilet this size in our house...
6. Mason (and his daddy) won first place for their snowman at an event at our church. $10 to McDonalds was his prize. Bought himself (and daddy, mommy, and Molly) lunch!!!
7. We love For The Kidz Gym...
8. And after a good work-out we tested out the new donut shop in Hudsonville...Sprinkles. We approve!!!
9. Daddy bought Mase a new shirt. If you all know me...I am not a fan of Cartoony clothing. Just not my thing. However, Mase was in his glory. Wore the shirt for 2 days straight. Would.Not.Take.It.Off.
10. Snack time. Gatorade + Pretzels = YummO,